8 Secrets to a Happy & Healthy Marriage
What do those people in happy marriages know, that you don’t? Set yourself up for a happy, healthy and long relationship by following some simple hints or read on for the Extra 8 Secrets of the people in Happy Marriages.
Simple Hints to Marriage Happiness
Date night – never stop dating or having special times alone. Don’t forget the things you first did together when you were dating and keep doing them. Be enthusiastic about your time together, plan it well doing something that makes both your hearts sing. Share interests and find things to do together. Just make sure you turn off your mobile phone.
Make breakfast on Saturday or Sunday mornings special times while you cooking bacon and eggs together, one of you can be squeezing the oranges while the other butters the toast.
Make your marriage your priority, don’t put other things in front of spending special or quality time together or doing things with your partner. Create a ritual for the two of you that you do each week and never break it.
Do little things to appreciate your Spouse
Small things can make a difference, a hug, a smile, the glance that no one else sees, touching his arm as you walk past all can let the other person know they are special to you. Never leave the house without saying goodbye, giving them a kiss and a hug, it doesn’t take much time but the rewards will be huge.
Call your partner by a special pet name, a name only you call them it will be a term of endearment and will keep the tone light even when it comes heavy.
Don’t sweat the small stuff.
No relationship is perfect but we are all responsible for our own happiness, so being cross or unhappy over something that isn’t important or even silly can destroy the mood for the rest of the day and drag on for long periods of time. If it isn’t important then don’t stress and definitely don’t carry on. Don’t point the finger or blame them for things that just don’t matter, just get on with it and distress the situation, forgiveness goes a long way so be gentle with each other. If something is bugging you, brainstorm ways to change it or just get over it.
Compliment them frequently
Give compliments, make the other person feel extra special, apologise often and be generous to each other. Do something special for your partner and make them feel loved and appreciated such as leaving notes around for them to find, or send text messages telling them you are thinking about them.
Say thank you and appreciate the little things that he does for you. These two little words will make a massive difference in not making the other person feel like you are taking them for granted.
Communication is essential without it there is no relationship.
Connect with each other every night to talk about your day. Express all your feelings and emotions openly and honestly with them, don’t hold back because this isn’t being honest. Listen to the other person so you can understand their feelings and points of view. Always be honest with them, never embellish, ignore or dismiss things even when you are embarrassed and don’t want to share, allow yourself to show your vulnerable side so you can both be the emotional support each other needs. Remember you also hold their confidences, sharing and keeping secrets is a huge privilege.
Don’t fight resolve the issue quickly and calmly.
If you get angry, stop and take a minute before you blow up and say things you don’t mean. Address issues quickly and directly by speaking up before they can escalate and get out of control. Make all your communication calm rather than heated, have solutions and ideas or alternatives in mind before you bring up the problem, a discussion is often the best way to resolve conflict. Remember you don’t always need to win, resolving the issue is more important. Take responsibility for your behaviour and your part in the situation because there is always two sides to every situation. Aploogize when you have made a mistake, or have been taken the wrong way or misunderstood, your partner will appreciate the honesty.
Discover your partners love language
According to the 1992 best selling Gary Chapman book there are 5 love languages that each of us relate to, find out what your partners love language is and do that. There is no good giving him gifts and presents if his love language is touch, you would be better off holding his hand when you walk somewhere or touching his arm when you are talking. This book is worth a look
Keep the passion in the relationship
Kiss often, even if you need to hide and have a big deep kiss often, the moment will be worth it. Keep the passion alive and act as if your relationship is new and hot. Make love passionately, it has always been about quality over quantity. Spice things up if you need to bring back a bit of zing into the bedroom, read a book and get some different ideas.
Accept each other for who you are.
Encourage each other to be the best they can be in all areas. Don’t judge them, don’t try to control them or change them. Accept your spouse for who they are, respect them as they are because you can not change them if they don’t want to. By accepting them you are more likely to have a happy and satisfying relationship.
Your partner should be your best friend, have fun together, laugh together, laugh often and enjoy each others company and make sure you eliminate boredom by adding in surprises, changing the routine and planning vacations together to make things remain exciting like it was in the beginning of the relationship. Remember why you fell in love in the first place and never to stop dating!!!
By nurturing this relationship, enjoying the friendship, devoting time, energy and working on it by being committed to making it amazing you will keep it fresh and alive so you can live happily ever after.
– Lorene Roberts